promises...

are not meant to be broken. not especially if they were made by your close friend. or friends.

sigh throughout this year i got pangseh-ed quite a few times already, so i don't know why i'm even feeling anything about it now. for some reason, i'm still peeved. it's not that you're unwilling to do it, it's the fact you told me you would, before deciding you wouldn't.

and i really think these close friends of mine don't find me half as close as i do of them. but then again i'm so obnoxious sometimes (or most of the times) perhaps i'm just really unbearable and hard/impossible to get along with.

whatever man, i'll try not to let these stupid things get in the way of work, even if i'll be working a lot with these 'close friends' next year. obligations, obligations...

ambivalence

hmm ok so i've received a few papers back today...

chinese: 85! yay i got my 4.0! first time in 3 years! =)

chem: 79 for the paper... and i got 79 overall... heh missed my 4.0 by 1 mark =(

physics: 51... *emo cries slits wrist*

SS: nearly failed my first question. got full marks for the 2nd. in the end got 23! =P

and math da bomb! mr vijay came in to tell us our class ranks one of the lowest in the batch! i dun think he meant to suan us or anything, but i think he's kinda frustrated we can't do well. some ppl are pretty unhappy with what they're hearing... and i think both sides have their reasons la... w.e the case maybe i got a 2.4, but i'll still try to remain optimistic!

koonz, if u're reading this, cheer up! and any 3K-ians (though i think koonz is the only one)

so basically i did well for the papers other ppl sucked in and i sucked at the papers other ppl owned in. wah dunno what to think now... damn confused >.<

getting back hist + lit + eng tmr... and these are the 3 papers im damn 紧张 about... gah...

i'll bite cheeyeow if i fail.

jap food!

yay went to sakae with hq cheeyeow and jonathan today!

we sat there and ate for like 3 hours. the food's not bad la... though cheeyeow would have preferred the usual servings of a few cows...

oh and cheeyeow treated me to half the buffet cost! =D

yipee i love them! this makes being 15 really cool for me! thx guys! =)

desolate

sigh screwed up my lit paper...

so much for ending my EOYs on a high note...

managed to take my mind off on shide's nintendo... damn fun la!

shide if u're reading this, thx for today! or else i'll most prob just emo and rot away...

Sigh oh well in life, there's always the ups and downs. since there's a down, i'll most probably see the up soon! maybe... maybe... i dunno...

just trying to console myself...













i feel wasted.

pathos

I.found.physics.easy.

Oh.my.god.

I was thinking how happy Burg must have been when he saw the paper...

Anyways lit paper is tmr! The final paper and the one i wish to do well in the most! I seem prepared and yet I can't help but think how high the benchmark would be set at when we sit for the same paper as the litRA peeps... Yeah I know I shouldn't compare but... Ah well =]

Sigh. EOYs. Pathos. =[]

Chemistry?

chem·is·try /ˈkɛməstri/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[kem-uh-stree] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun, plural -tries.

sympathetic understanding; rapport: the astonishing chemistry between the actors.

any or all of the elements that make up something: the chemistry of love.

---

uhhh nope im pretty sure this isn't what chemistry is all about...

不值得

Ordeal

The mass of black swirl in my mind. Seemingly obscure, yet strangely familiar.

Salad. That's what I had for dinner last night. Yes, that's it. I'm attributing this senselessness to it. Word salad, that's what's going on.

The classroom has transmogrified. I was no longer safe. This is a struggle to survive. Armed with a ballpoint, I sieved out my prey - the strange-looking creatures who term themselves 'equations'.

Unfathomable. Enigmatic. The way they're born to be.

The clock ticks, and with it, the rhythmic pounding of my heart. My attempt at concealing this trepidation has failed. The enemy grins sardonically, as if taunting me, feeding upon my despair and thriving upon it.

Soon, perspiration superseded ink and the questions blurred even further. I forced the nib onto the paper but the sheet was blank. I established a connection at last.

Finally I clear my mind; only as the arbiter cleared his throat.

conclusion

5 days to the countdown! D-day's coming...

While we can't wait for the EOYs to be over, it is tragic to know we are so close to the literal end of year. It is only when i look back now that i realise how fufilling my sec 3 life has been, and strangely enough, academia is the least of which i attribute this to.

I have got to known a class of 27 people... 27 people with varied talents, diversified personalities and yet all loving in their own way. 3K is significantly different from my previous class; a nice change, though. This is a class which has taught me so much, which has made me realise how much i need to improve in order to catch up to them.

I have got to known my batch of sec 3s from 01 so much more as well...

Enemies turn into friends... friends turn into better friends... and better friends turned into best friends... It is appalling how i have not managed to appreciate you guys previously. On a matter of self-reflection, i have managed to learn so much from you guys as well. I have enjoyed working with you guys, and i look forward to next year when we will all cast aside other restrictions and form the new venture batch, and possibly the best we will have known. Im sry for taking you guys as granted in the past...

I have got to known my juniors so much more with my new position, and of course with it, the empathy i now feel for my seniors who have all been in my predicament. However, no matter how sticky a situation i might be in, i have never felt leadership to be a burden, but a responsibility which i take pride in. I have learnt alot from all you peeps, especially those in Hawk patrol'07. Thanks alot, for the bittersweet memories (sweet mostly heh).

Finally... I have got to known myself so much more. Look around and you'll realise how many opportunities lie hidden, waiting to spring an unexpected lesson upon you. Chew on that people; that's the most important lesson i've learnt this year.

I guess the reason why so many of us are trying hard to do well for this EOYs is so we may conclude our life as a sec 3 resoundingly, proving our abilities to our friends, families, and most importantly, to ourselves.










Let's do this.

Da Man

Today I went for my first assembly in 3 weeks... and was stunned by the flabbergasting speeches made by the prefect nominees... Indeed these people will never cease to amaze me. I'm fine with all the cliche speeches , since they do make sense and that's what I'll probably do anyway. But, come on, would anyone really vote for a guy who goes up and shouts "Bang Bang! Vote for Wank!"?

Well, anyway, started the day off with propaganda dmp. Jonathan, Joseph, Dehong, Mark, Shuan and I went to stone outside com lab in junior block. Apparently we've gotten the venue wrong. Nope, we didn't do it on purpose, though we weren't really upset about our mistake either. Jonathan, Joseph and I went up to the third floor at admin block and found the place. The others... well... let's just say they'd be better off studying cartography on the micro scale. It would really do them some good.

We were supposed to create our own posters relating to propaganda; to craft a new publicity campaign for the SIA to replace the Singapore Girl as their icon. In the end we just fooled around and didn't accomplish much. Nothing at all, actually. That is unless you would count my maiden attempt at modifying pictures with microsoft paint, which resulted in a poorly drawn plane the size of Bart Simpson's ass heading towards Bart Simpson's ass, something constructive.


After that we (Jonathan, Koala, Haoqin and I) were free till assembly. We were thinking of ponning assembly but guided by our moral conscience we decided against it; such an act simply does not befit our dignified status of noble Rafflesians (hur hur). The 1 hour was mainly spent questioning the 6 prefect candidates from the batch and to determine if they were worth our votes. Well it didn't really affect my judgement; I'm casting a blank vote. I'm not being an arse here... I just don't know them well enough to determine if they're up to the job.

Well anyway so Haoqin and I stayed back for investment dmp later on at 1:45. The first part of the dmp was boring as usual. Sure, the lecturer knew his stuff and was extremely passionate about what he was doing, but being sarb-koalas we just couldn't stay awake.

And yes, finally, we've arrived at the highlight of this post (not much anyway). The Chief Investment Officer of Goldman Sachs Asia, Mr. Fan Jiang, came down specially to give us a talk on his experiences and views on investment. We were all extremely impressed with the way he carried himself and of course, the contents of his speech. He was humorous and yet maintained the sort of composure one would expect from a man like him. In the end we managed to learn loads from him. And he commented we were smart and asked good questions. Hehe some of them were planted by the instructor in case we couldn't ask any. =S

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goldman_Sachs (check this out)

Fahrenheit 9/11

I caught this show during history DMP yesterday.

'Fahrenheit 9/11' is basically a movie proposing the conspiracy theory of George Bush. Personally the show gave me great insights and provided a clearer understanding of American politics. While all along I, along with perhaps the rest of the world, have been thinking that George Bush is but a incompetent president, I've realised I might be wrong -- incompetent as he may be, he may prove to be one hell of a cunning ***.

The show was meant to be humorous -- to gain attention I suppose. Personally I didn't really find it funny, esepcially not when the movie involved the Iraq war and bombings. I think it's scary, actually, that such a man, devoid of compassion, is put into such a position of power. He is unable to justify the reasons for waging war on Iraq and that's how the conspiracy theory came about anyway. His conflicting stands, wishy-washiness simply does not fit the profile of the president of the most powerful country in the world. What should happen if some day Bush were to claim the presence of chemical weapons in Singapore? I mean, it's not probable but hey, isn't that the whole point of CLE lessons on empathy? Like to understand how it's like to be in the other person's shoe? Gah.

Sigh all right enough of this emo-ness. So I had BCG presentation and lit lesson in school day.

The BCG presentations were pretty good. I thought the first team (envirob) was extremely impressive, and I wonder if my team will be able to cope if we were to undertake this project... Oh well if we get in we'll try our best. =)

Lit lesson was... short. It lasted for about an hour and it was more of a re-cap than anything else. During discussion Junyong and Hernwei told me i was being too aggressive... and I didn't even realise! I had absolutely no intent on showing aggression in any way... it was totally subconscious... Ok i really have to consciously check on my behaviour... Hmph.

Shall hardcore physics now! =)

the in-thing

今天不回家。。。

i got locked out of my house! again!

sigh im really careless... ended up having to wait 40 minutes for my mom =(
spent that time doing chin-ups and stoning... i feel like a sarb-koala

ok anyway i shall start typing properly because cheeyeow finds my sentences too disjointed and hard to read. =X

investment dmp today was really good. the instructor was really well-prepared, for one, and really passionate and enthusiastic about teaching us. he's only in his early twenties by the looks of it, and yet a successful (i think) businessman! he taught us loads of stuff and tips with regards to investment... alot more helpful than econs dmp i should think (being the pragmatic person i am, hehe)

anyways after that went to join shoujian clinton and junyong at the library. i pulled cheeyeow along with me. as i expected, they didn't get down to much studying. mostly um digressed to... sensitive issues... haha...

since i arrived really late they only stayed for about 45 minutes and we left. i forced cheeyeow to have dinner with me (yes he's my mindless slave) and i took about 1 hour to eat my ban mian... and he went on with his cock-and-bull story of me being anorexic and bullemic... and linked it to weird people. haha cheeyeow's a bugger...

anyways really gta get down to mugging for math and the sciences! focused too much on lit... not gna benefit me... shall go mug now...

campus super-parents

went out for dinner with my relatives (maternal)

12 ppl in all! been a long time since i saw them... my aunt was like "wah change specs ah nice leh"... i changed this specs quite long ago... must see more of them!

anyway i didn't realise it was my mom's bday today... feel so bad. shall get her a present. so we had a nice meal at the coffeeshop and then a cool mangocake and bday song for both my cousin and mom. happy bday mom (though u won't read this)

and then when we were returning home my parents decided to drop by our 2nd apartment (the one they use to store their goods) to pick sth up. and while we were on it my mom sang a song with the karaoke set... shan't comment since it was my mom... but better than i expected =P they told me they were taking part in a singing comp! so cool!

hope they win. yah. =D

words words words

ok i was feeling bored so decided to improve my vocab by playing a little game with haoqin... we pick words and make funny sentences to remember the meanings! =)

ineluctable: we are ineluctable from our fate of being devoured by shide one day

ephemeral: the ephemeral feelings of orgasm are short-lived; unless u're jeremy

extropolate: having seen shide and jeremy together, one can extropolate that judgement day is imminent

then haoqin's one was -- when the asseveration was made by the panjandrum of 01, jeremy, the others would have no choice but to acquiesce with him

NOTE THAT HAOQIN TERMED JEREMY AS PANJANDRUM (a self-important or pretentious official)

hehehe =)

Emergency in Darfur

on propoganda

had 2 dmps today -- chem bonding and propoganda

chem bonding was... boring... mainly revision of what i've learnt in sec 2... sigh...

but propoganda dmp was super cool!

learnt proper definition of the word we've been using so much

propoganda --> manipulation of public opinion to bring about desired action

popular culture --> culture of the masses (music, radio, movies, etc etc)

and it was only today i realised "where is the love" by BEP is a piece of propoganda... positive example though... go examine the lyrics if u haven't done so =)

interesting lyrics...

"Waiting On The World To Change"

Me and all my friends
We're all misunderstood
They say we stand for nothing and
There's no way we ever could

Now we see everything that's going wrong
With the world and those who lead it
We just feel like we don't have the means
To rise above and beat it

So we keep waiting
Waiting on the world to change
We keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

It's hard to beat the system
When we're standing at a distance
So we keep waiting
Waiting on the world to change

Now if we had the power
To bring our neighbors home from war
They would have never missed a Christmas
No more ribbons on their door
And when you trust your television
What you get is what you got
Cause when they own the information, oh
They can bend it all they want

That's why we're waiting
Waiting on the world to change
We keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

It's not that we don't care,
We just know that the fight ain't fair
So we keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

And we're still waiting
Waiting on the world to change
We keep on waiting waiting on the world to change
One day our generation
Is gonna rule the population
So we keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change

We keep on waiting
Waiting on the world to change


--

night hike

night hike's over...

started off the activity badly... 8 out of 9 FCSB candidates were late cuz of hike log and that really pissed the GC and teachers off. 8 ppl delaying the entire SU? and the 8 being sec 3s, 5 of which were PLs? if i were the gc i would have owned us on the spot...

anyway so we started the hike off in orchard area which was super crowded (duh). mr tan weng seng screwed us at the first checkpoint for poor behaviour... not that he wasn't right but honestly it's hard not to be a nuisance to the public when you're a group of 60 walking in ri uniform in orchard road.

anyways night hike was just night hike and we walked happily all the way to east coast. must say that after FCSB hike this was super easy... 20 km lol wth. had to take care of my injured sec 1 though... can't imagine how they're going to get past GTC man...

anyways J1s finally had their revelation today... won't say what it is but it was really sad for me... i think jeremy's post was really kinda expected. but i really thought jonathan and i would be able to work tgt next year... not saying that chuyong isn't good... he's really nice and all that but he's just different from trach. nvm it's ok i'll still be working with trach on most projects i suppose... sigh...

oh and the j1s made us down 120 (didn't do a single proper push-up la pls). ivan died at like 40 or sth. cheeyeow collapsed. my arms buckled and my wrists totally dieded. think only trachsel felt fine after that >_>

triple 5!

just calculated dist. travelled for FCSB hike...

i did 55.5km. w00tz!

tt's like 1 hour by car. it's sad to know i can fall asleep, wake up, and i'd have completed the dist. travelled for my 1 and a half day gruelling hike. but tt's ok. =D

think jonathan did 60... but think i own most of the rest. yay!

looking back, it's no wonder zhongjun died. but for some reason i didn't... felt it was easier than last year gtc! maybe it's becuz i dun have the, for the lack of a better word, burden of a patrol to take care of. gtc meant constant pushing and encouragement to keep the patrol tgt... oh well...

YAY!

Whee...

Ok this is my 3rd attempt at sustaining a blog... Hope it won't die this time =)

I'm a really boring person... So well.. "Love it or hate it". I shan't care this time.